Aging Gracefully & Defiantly…

Aging Gracefully and Defiantly

I work in a community where women and men take care of themselves. They eat well, take care of their skin and bodies, seek various methods of training and nutritional programs that will help them feel and look better. They also utilize other age defying methods like plastic surgery to stay and feel youthful. There is nothing wrong with any of this! It is inspiring to see so many people work hard to stay as young and healthy as they can.

Taking care of yourself will help you stay, feel, and look young. However, spectrum of “taking care of yourself” is vast and can lead to overdoing it. We all want to look great as we age and we all want our quality of life to be positively sustained as we age. However, your quality of life gets disturbed when all you think about is not eating or over exercising or going to change your face so much that you become unrecognizable to others. This happens a lot. At least in my community.

I try to be different. I was raised by immigrants and we were poor. There was no time for self care or age defying products and methods. Our goal was to survive and flourish through our hard work and education. And that we did! But in the process of making a better life for ourselves, we were taught to always try to look our best and take care of our appearance because that showed respect to ourself and others. There was an ease to this. It was effortless. We used what we had available to us to look and feel great. There was no pressure or judgment. If anything, this easy attempt to look nice became our norm and a way to life. But there was balance. Our looks did not define us. Nor did our clothes. I saw my parents age and still look great because they owned their years and did the best they could to stay beautiful. And they did. This was my childhood. There was no excess in anything! Just hard work!

When I entered a more privileged community, I had access to every and any age defying product that existed. But somehow, I remembered how I was raised, with moderation being an important value, and sought balance as opposed to overindulgence.

I am 54 years old and I want to look good and sustain myself as a beautiful, strong, healthy woman. But the truth is, I’m getting older and love what age has delivered on my platter. I am wise, confident, aware, compassionate, able to share myself and receive what others want to share with me. I am open to success and failure because I know I can get to the other side of anything.

So I am happy with how I have evolved as a person. Now, physically things are changing and that is ok. I believe there should be an acceptance to age. There is nothing more beautiful to me than an older woman who walks into the room and she is proud and graceful and comfortable with herself. To see a woman like this inspires the question: “what has she been through, what has she conquered, and what can I do to be her when I walk into the room a couple of years from now?” I want to be this woman, a role model to other women. A woman who ages gracefully, accepts her age and owns that every one of her steps has been earned. She knows it! No one can chip at her because she is solid and secure with herself and she ultimately knows that even if someone tries to bring her down, or life brings her down, she will get right back up! This is the woman I want to be! This woman has aged gracefully!

Now don’t get me wrong…. I said that this woman is beautiful! When I say age gracefully, I don’t mean let yourself go and accept whatever age brings. I believe you should use everything in your reach with moderation as your guiding principle, to help you feel and look better. Take care of your body, your skin, eat healthy, have connecting relationships, feed your soul with good books and knowledge and conversation with peers who love you. Connect and help others as much as you can. Look in the mirror and love what you see with compassion and gentleness. If you want plastic surgery, do it. Just be mindful of getting sucked into the world of excess and obsession. Everything in moderation! That is what I was taught. I believe it helps the body and soul stay healthy. Don’t forbid yourself from enjoying life!

Aging gracefully to me is about an understanding of who you are! It’s about acceptance and a great appreciation of your life, your worth and your love. Be kind to yourself and appreciate your days on this earth. But do whatever you can to feel and look good. Do the best you can! And never compare yourself to anyone else. No one has earned your specific years but you! Be that beautiful older woman that walks into the room!